An abusive person generally has an abusive history. When people go through traumatic events in life, it tends to stick in their memories for the longest time, until God’s supernatural healing overtakes the mind and the heart. No methodology, medicine, or therapy can take away people’s pain and traumatic past as can God alone, Who knows all hearts of men. After all, the enemy we are fighting against cannot be seen, and he aims to steal, kill, and destroy people’s lives (see John 10:10). That is why Jesus Christ came—to destroy the works of the devil and to give us a rich and satisfying life (1 John 3:8 and John 10:10). Only a life with Jesus Christ at the center can help free us from the works of the enemy such as traumas from our abusive pasts. “If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed” (John 8:36). So, how do you pray for an abusive husband? You can pray to God in this manner:
In Jesus’ name, I speak life and the love of Christ upon my husband. I command every demonic spirit and stronghold be cast out upon his life! I speak healing to his memories and deliverance from any childhood traumas. May the God of peace crush Satan under our feet. May the peace of God flow to my husband’s mind and heart, from the top of his head down to his feet, right now in Jesus’ name. Amen!
As you are here looking for how to pray for an abusive husband, know that God is your comforter and shield. He is the protector of your heart, and we praise Him for keeping you and sustaining you and for your unconditional love toward your husband. Having an abusive husband is a tough situation and requires wisdom, godly counsel, trusted friends, and a support group that can speak to your life, marriage, and family. You must know that you don’t have to face this situation alone. It is important to seek godly counsel from married folks and friends, who can pray with you and speak wisdom and life to you, your husband, and your situation.
Most of all, have someone in authority who can assess the situation with the wisdom of God, especially since many kinds of abuse may require you to distance yourself from your husband for the time being, such as in the case of physical violence or sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse, as well as manipulation or control. This is not how God designed marriage to be. Ephesians 5:25 says that husbands must love their wives as Christ loved the Church.
How to Pray for an Abusive Husband
You must pray with authority in Christ Jesus as you deal with your abusive husband. Your true enemy is not your spouse but the spirit behind him—whispering lies, reliving traumatic memories, and building fears that then tend to be projected on you and your family. Hurt people will keep on hurting people, which is why it is important to keep declaring life, deliverance, and healing to your husband. And more importantly, seek help and counseling from trusted godly leaders and friends who can guide you both, pray with you, and speak God’s Word to your marriage.
How do you manage abusive behavior?
As discussed earlier, there are many kinds of abusive behavior. You must detect which type is the problem so you can identify how you are going to deal with it. For instance, emotional and verbal abuse from your husband may not give you any physical signs of abuse, yet inwardly it can slowly destroy you if you are not careful. You must resist believing the lies that come with this type of abuse—putting you down, causing you to doubt your worth and capabilities, yelling at you, intentionally embarrassing you in front of others, preventing you from seeing your friends and families, threatening you, being overly jealous, and so on. As for physical abuse, no one deserves to be abused physically and sexually. God created us to love and be loved, and such acts violate God’s very design and purpose in marriage. So, how then do you manage a husband who displays abusive behavior?
As Christians, we have the greatest privilege to live life’s circumstances victoriously because we have Jesus Christ. We have the Holy Spirit and the Word of God constantly reminding us of who we truly are in Christ – the Father’s great promises for us – and His love that cannot be compared to that of anyone, not even the sweetest spouse. As you consistently walk with God and meditate on His Word continuously, you can guard your heart and mind against whatever abusive behavior is trying to get to you. You know your spouse isn’t your enemy but that it’s the spiritual enemy, the devil, who is trying to replicate hurt, pain, and traumas. The enemy is simply using your husband in order to get to you, break you down, and destroy your marriage and your family. You must stay even closer to God and His Word at this moment of your life. Isaiah 26:3 says, Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.
How to Pray for an Abusive Husband
Moreover, it is important to reach out and open up your situation to someone who is godly and may be able to help you, pray for you, and give you godly wisdom and practical solutions. If it is recommended that you stay away from your husband for the time being, pray about it and don’t be afraid. For your own good, you must do certain things even if it may hurt him. You must not manage the abusive behaviors of your husband alone, as this might put you and your children at harm. To help you in your situation, you must pray to God to lead you to the right person to share your problems with. We are a body of Christ, and God made us to share burdens with each other (see Galatians 6:2). So, don’t take on this tough journey alone. Reach out to your pastors, your godly friends, and your Spirit-filled leaders; if your family believes in Christ, share your trials with your parents.
You don’t want to share this problem with just anyone because, as much as possible, we are hoping to restore your husband and your marriage. That is definitely the will of God. We know that God is a miracle-working God, and nothing is impossible with Him. He can touch even the hardest hearts, convert satanists, etc. As much as possible, you want people to be speaking life to your husband and to your marriage. Otherwise, nonspiritual counseling does not perceive what the enemy is trying to achieve, and others may judge based on their knowledge and standards but not according to the Word of God. That is why you should pray about it. Share this problem with a godly counsel and let God’s will be done.
Last, don’t give up on praying for your husband. If worst comes to worst and you have to be really separated from your husband, still pray for him. Remember that he is a broken person that the enemy has targeted and tormented for years. You are the only one who witnessed your husband’s brokenness, and you are his only hope for the salvation, freedom, healing, and deliverance of his soul as you continuously pray for him.
May the Lord Jesus Christ bring light to your situation, and we declare freedom, restoration, and the miracle-working power of God in Christ Jesus to your husband, your marriage, and your family. Amen.